Wednesday, September 02, 2009

beauty in the midst of uncertainty

Every day is Sunday, that's the way Carly put it the other day while Beautiful and I were on the couch reading, the boys napping, Jesse at the dining room table on the computer. It was 2 in the afternoon and we were all home, seemingly without a care in the world. Looks are deceiving though. Both Beautiful and I were trying to take a break from the worry by getting lost in a good book. I think I was more successful then she was. After long periods of no response from resumes followed by the occasional 'thanks but no thanks letter', Beautiful got an interview. We were both excited knowing how winning she is but it turns out the company that scheduled the interview is just a pyramid scheme in the form of Insurance sales. Jesse had been to an interview/recruitment seminar the other week and warned her away. What was some hope in the midst of the crushing silence turned out to be mirage. Beautiful was discouraged, really discouraged for a bit. I told her she isn't unemployed she's just under-employed and for some reason that helped. She has two jobs now and is staying pretty busy. Our bank account seems to be a loaves and fishes miracle where a little has gone a long way. We are mostly in good spirits and only occasionally get pulled under by the worry. It is great being with the boys and getting to take the train to the zoo in the middle of the afternoon but there is something to be said for a bit of security and insurance. So after 2 months of unemployment for me and underemployment for Beautiful we are still hopeful and positive most of the time. We are enjoying the time together and taking advantage of the journey like Linsey advised. We have seen and spent time with lots of friends and family that we would not have to chance to if we had a full time job and for that we are thankful. Really for all of it I am thankful, this is not too much to handle. It is hard to be sure but I am thankful for the hard stuff and the beauty in the midst of uncertainty.