Tuesday, October 17, 2006

A helping hand starts with a question

This happens to me a good number of times, enough to cause me to think about it for a second. While trying to do something I thought was helpful I ended up offending, or at least mildly annoying. I think I am getting to the bottom of this though. The key lies in the "Something I thought..." So many times I will see what I think is a need and then formulate how I can help with that. Now there are many times when I get it right but too often to be ignored now are the times when I don't. I guess the obvious solutions to just ask what I can do but how often do we really know what would help, or even admit we need any help. I need to take that chance more often though. You know what they say "the road to hell is paved with good intentions."

2 comments:

Jamie said...

You stated the solution within the paragraph. Always ask "If there is something I can help with let me know." Instead of just jumping in. Most times if your help is needed the person will gladly respond. If they don't then the burden is on them and not you. To this day this situation is still a big stumbling block for me. I'm too helpful sometimes and I end up getting in the way. Especially with Myron. However, it is a double edged sword, sometimes they say they don't need help and complain later that no one helped. Yikes!

Meg Schroeder said...

My incredibly wise friend Amy says "ask for what you need, give what you have." I like that in that it is proactive, can we help too much? I guess if those around us, as well as ourselves, could also work on asking for what they need, maybe communication wouldn't break down...